Home is where you are
Now I'm sitting here in the Libary, after a grammar lecture, sorrunded by other students. I wonder what they're doing. Studying? Are you sure? Well yes, some of them are for sure doing serious studies. But many of them are just sitting in their own thoughts just like me... All day long I've felt this need for being alone. That's the disadvantage of being a poor student, you have to accept to share your accomandation sometimes. Means it's hard to get some privatcy. Now I sound like a maverick (ensamvarg), but I don't think people here would call me that, because I usually act very social. But maybe I need to be alone more than I think.
Anyway... My love for my friends and everything that make me feel at home, have appered very clear to me these days.
Our american culture teacher says that many americans have identital crisis, like they not belong anywhere. I think many are..... The source, of where creative music and art emerge, is very often where a lot of different immigrants from all over the world collide. As in New york, London, Israel. As a foreigner you are the most vulnerble alien, desperate of finding you way. But they are indeed also the most innovative and open people.
I had one tea bag left from when Anna and Anna were here, we drank yogi tea. A little message hung from it..... Challanges create strengths.
This song is stuck inside my head
You got to give a little more than you take
You got to leave a little more than what's here
You may be frightful of the strifes you will meet
But keep one thing clear
You're just a player in a much bigger plan
And still you got to give it all that you can
The very measure of your soul is at stake
You got to give a little more than you take
The title of my essay: "If you can master the language, you can master the world"
We've read the play "Educating Rita", which is about an young woman of the working class wanting to live and control her life.
My secondary source is an text about speeches of Hitler and Churchill.
INTERESTING, you think?
Well, well, well you... Some words can do much in some situations.
I saw Prince of Egypt this morning....I flew away back to Israel for a while. The music in Disney films is incredible. ..... There can be miracles, when you believe..... DON'T ALWAYS HAPPENS WHEN YOU ASKING FOR IT....AND IT'S EASY TO GIVE IN....BUT A SMALL BUT STILL RELIEVING VOICE......SAYS AID IS VERY NEAR....oOOOOO!!!! I had my own little show here for my window, hahahaha!
....Life in Brighton....
i wish i was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair
The best film I've seen in months is.....no dout about it.......Breakfast club. It's basically about an 8 hour long detention. How much can happen in a classrum, somewhere in Chicago in the 80's, between five totally different students? A geek, a princess, a criminal, a sport fan and a completely weirdo. Everyone has their own story. You better see it!!
The first two weeks in Brighton I went to the cinema four times and saw Black Swan, Never let me go, Kings speech and Brighton rock. I know, it's a special part of my character, I just have to go all in sometimes. The only memorable experience I've got was from Black Swan, in a bad way, I was feeling sick literally. But it wasn't really bad, it was fascinating in a scary, wonderful way.
Homever (OH MY GOD, don't tell me I'm using that silly word our grammar teacher force us to use instead of BUT, It makes me so annoyed!) I've missed films like Breakfast club.
Almost famous is also a good one. I'm nostalgic because that film was occurred in the 70's.
I wonder if a new hippie period is going to come soon. Hope so.
firework
And let it shine
Cos you're a firework
A guitar and a bedside table, what can you more wish for?
Yesterday was my lucky day. After a day of walking around in all the small streets of Brighton by myself, (I was hunting a cheap guitar, that is harder than you can imagine).... But I took a break when I met Bianca and took a cappucino with her. On my way home to Hove we past the musicshop and guess whaaaaat, I found my guitar there :) And while walking up for Lansdowne street, with the guitar on my back, I found a little bedside table beside the container. Someone had abandoned it there. So now it has its place beside my bed, perfect.
.....
your eyes are on the waves of silver. People and birds and thoughts and colours and your memories are passing you by. Do you see? The sky is endless above your head, while you're walking. You hear music. You hear voices. Sounds. The wind is coming, the wind is going
, do you follow? You feel, but can never explain.
Make my day
Here comes a message I want to live for every day of my life. You only live once. Once. Life is way to short to have boring och do something you find meaningless. It really is. IT REALLY IS, SO WAKE UP. Why are you doing something you don't want to do? To be good? For who? Sooo tragic. Why do you choose to whine when you can laugh about all the comic situations of life? Why do you worry instead of beliveing that everything is gonna be ok.
(I don't think it's a good idea to smile-like-we-mean-it-smile 24/7, but that's not really my point at all. To be down sometimes is a essential part of life. I talked about this while eating my breakfast in the most cosy english cafe with my friend Bianca this morning. Our conclusion: There is no more terrible thing than a constant fake-smile on someone's face. But a pure smile for less than one second, a smile with your eyes can make your day. By the way, I ate a toast banana cake which I LOVED).
Occasionaly I just wake up and thinking about when I'm old, it would be a nighmare if I sat there and ask myself why I didn't dare to live. And by the way I want to live when I'm an old lady as well.
Ok then. Where is my sense of homour? Serious serious Hanna, ease up. My funny stories I used to tell....
Well here is one.
Me and Bianca at a party.
We ate a lot of cakes and sat in the sofa for hours and nothing seemed to happens. No really good converasations. No really good music. We looked at each other and we both knew we were thinking the same thought. This atmosphere is so killing all kind of creativity.
-Is something going to happen here? Bianca asked me.
-Seems that this tea party never gonna turn to something else. I said.
-Why are we here then? Bianca asked.
-We're in fucking Brighton, have we forgotten? There're lots of pubs. I said.
-Let's go then.
I waved gentle with my hand to the rest of the party members.
-Where are you think you're going?
-Out. I said.
-But we're coming with you.
-Sure, I said.
-We're going now, Bianca said, NOW.
-But we must wait for everyone.
(Everyone is including 20 different persons wishes)
-Goodbye. I said.
And we went. Took our bottle of wine and walked to the south lanes. It was so much nicer to talk about weird and right-on conversations, so tierd of going around the real point.
Sun
I think I got the inspiration from yesterday, when me and my class where on a guidetour thrugh the english countryside. I was amazed of the beautiful nature and the small villages and towns we saw... it's like scenes from Pride and Prejudice or scenes from the hobbits villages in The Lord of the Ring. But even more genuin. I didn't expect that, so I was overwhelmed.
Today I'm going to enyoy this sunny day. (rainy days are standard otherwise)
I miss you. I hope you enjoy your day whereever you are.
Have patience...I'm learning
It can be hard to live with people and it can be hard to live without people. That's what I've learned today.
And I've even learned what concord is when it comes to correctness in the English language.
What have I learned more?
That it's beautiful too see the flowers grow outside this university window I'm sitting next too.
That thoughts about traveling and friends of mine make me feel warm.
My learnings for today. Lets see if Im gonna learn something more before this day is over.
I would like to learn how scones and tea taste on a day like this. :)
